Wonderful Ways to Help Someone Who’s Grieving
Most people truly want to help a friend who’s experiencing a severe loss. Words often fail us at times like these, leaving us stammering for the right thing to say.
Some people are so afraid to say or do the wrong thing that they choose to do nothing at all. That’s an option but it’s probably not the best one. While there is no one perfect way to support someone you care about, here are some good ideas to consider:
- Tackle challenging projects together. Depending on the circumstance, there may be difficult tasks that need tending to, such as casket shopping and mortuary visits. Offer your assistance and follow your friend’s lead in these tasks.
- Anticipate, don’t ask. Do not say “Call me if you need anything”, because your friend won’t call. Not because they don’t have a need, but because identifying what needs to be done and figuring out who to ask is beyond their energy or capacity at this challenging time. Instead, make concrete offers, such as, “I’ll stop by each morning on my way to work and give the dog a walk, OK?” And then do what you say you’re going to. Reliability is paramount.
- Don't avoid mentioning the person who passed. He or she is still very much in the mind of your grieving friend. Instead, reminisce or mention how the deceased inspired you or made you happy. Don't be afraid to say things like, "Wouldn't Shirley have loved these flowers?"
- Take care of the recurring things. The heavy work of grieving is not something you can do, but you can lessen the burden of routine life requirements for your friend. Are there recurring tasks or chores that you might do? Things like picking up some groceries, shoveling snow, and bringing in the mail are all good choices. Supporting your friend in small, ordinary ways is tangible evidence of your concern and affection.
- Check in on them, now and later. At the time of a funeral, many people offer help and support to the bereaved. But as the weeks and months pass, everyone’s lives move forward and their support often wanes. Be the person who follows up.
- Love them. Above all, demonstrate your love. Show up. Be willing to stand steadfastly beside your grieving friend. Listen. Be present. In the end, love is the thing that endures.
Your love and support can make all the difference to your grieving friend. Please contact us for other supportive ways you can assist someone through their journey of loss. We’re always here for you.
About Batchelor Brothers Funeral Services: As a leading African American-owned and operated funeral and cremation organization serving three states, Batchelor Brothers Funeral Services has provided a ministry of care to thousands of grieving families. We promise to provide our highest level of distinguished service and respect to families who entrust us to honor their loved one. In all aspects of the funeral process, we strive to be the absolute best and are honored to help preserve our clients’ legacies for future generations. For more information, please call us at 215-549-4700 or visit our website.